Daily Blog post 397: “Loving my Body”
Up until high school, I would pretend that I forgot to bring a change of clothes for PE class so I could sit out and didn’t have to expose my legs and arms.
When I was 10, my class went to Watermania for a field trip. I opted to stay home instead because one of my friends called me fat and I didn’t want the girl I had a crush on to see me in a vulnerable state.
When times got bad in high school, I’d hide in the bathroom during recess and breaks. I’d skip class because I thought everyone would be staring at me, and I couldn’t show myself to the world.
I can’t remember a time where I wasn’t insecure about my body.
Anyone who knows me knows that I have chronic eczema, but I don’t want that to define me. I don’t want that to hold me back anymore from living life to my fullest.
The past few months I’ve been actively learning to love my own skin. The 10 minutes I meditate every day has been helping, just being conscious and aware of my body. Working out, eating healthier, and just practicing self-care and self-love.
It’s not really about physical fitness though. I don’t care if I have a 6-pack, or if I have a bit more on my belly. (just more of me to love!)
But in about a year, it’s crazy to see how much my body has changed. And when I look back at the blog posts I wrote in the past year, from my first blog to the blogs I wrote in Singapore to the ones I wrote in Shanghai to the posts I wrote last week. They all show growth. They are bits of my past, showing small steps I’ve taken to self-love and self-care.
I can’t stress this enough, and I want all my friends and family to take care of themselves as well. I’ve neglected self-love, but I now see how important it is.
I don’t have the perfect body, and to this day I’m still incredibly insecure about it. But I’m learning to love my own skin, because, well, I’m stuck with it.
You have to learn to love yourself first before you can expect love from others.
Happy December everyone. I hope you all try to love yourself a bit more.
Also, a thank you to all my friends who have taught me to love my own body a bit more, either actively, or just by being my friend. Thanks, ❤